Ass Quotes by Bill Maher, John Cena, Molly Crabapple, Muhammad Iqbal, Andy Samberg, Nicki Minaj and many others.
Sometimes I’m dragging my ass out to the airport at 8 a.m. on a Saturday and I’m wondering why I’m doing this, but once I walk on stage I know why…because I’m addicted.
Kickin’, ass takin’ names, cashing checks, and breakin necks, the champ is here.
I feel like the traditional patron system meant that you would kiss the ass of one rich person and then hide all of the financial goings-on of your work, and you could pretend you were pure.
The intellect of two thousand asses cannot bring forth a single man’s thought.
It’s crazy. Since there have been men and women, there have been funny women… f**king idiot-ass men keep saying that women aren’t funny. It makes me crazy. I find it disgusting and offensive every time.
Go against me nowwww I dare you Bambi
Indie rock is just as susceptible – if not more susceptible – to all the gross things about people becoming total ass clowns in music, and only worrying about money and image. I’m not interested in being a part of that.
More Americans own their home than ever before. Nearly 70 percent of American’s are homeowners. So it is a good time for us to asses the positive impacts of homeownership on families, communities and on the nation’s economy.
I hate wack niggas, I should really slap niggas.
I probably wasted a couple of thousand dollars on some dumb-ass clothes.
A lion may die of an ass’s kick.
I had $60,000 for my first movie. I was 33 before I made any money off of movies. I worked my ass off for free. To get that I’m “enemy number one” among young kids is a little absurd.
The role of the poet is almost nothing…drearily nothing. And when he steps outside of his boots and tries to get tough as our dear Ezra [Pound] did, he will get his pink little ass slapped.
The job of the writer is to kiss no ass, no matter how big and holy and white and tempting and powerful.
They call me Seymour Butts, cause I get more ass than most.
I put on the boots and kicked some monster ass.
When we build, let us think that we build forever.
Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.
Pop ya kickstand little mama I’m the Nickster. I’ll pop you then I’ll pop your little sister.
“Fussy eater” is a euphemism for “big pain in the ass.”
The real story of our times is seldom told in the horse-puckey-filled memoirs of dopey, self-serving presidents or generals, but in the outrageous, demented lives of guys like Lenny Bruce, Giordano Bruno, Scott Fitzgerald – and Paul Krassner. The burrs under society’s saddle. The pains in the ass.
If we do a sequel, I want to beat somebody’s ass!
Held in the palms of thousands of disgruntled people over the centuries have been ideas worth millions – if they only had taken the first step and then followed through.
It’s really hard to get stories made that are about women. Not just women being obsessed with men, or supporting men. And it’s really hard to get men to be a part of films that are about women in a leading role. I’m really interested in how we can adjust that.
I told Khaled you the best but I’m the bestest. Better run for cover if your name is on my checklist.
Every man who has declared that some other man is an ass or a scoundrel, gets angry when the other man conclusively shows that the assertion was erroneous.
Feminism is the radical notion that women are human beings
A traveller must have the back of an ass to bear all, a tongue like the tail of a dog to flatter all, the mouth of a hog to eat what is set before him, the ear of a merchant to hear all and say nothing.
Hierarchy is an organization with its face toward the CEO and its ass toward the customer.
I love the John Glenn model… I may call NASA in 25 years or so, and see if they’d like to send me to Mars.
I have this little neighbor next door. He comes over and tells me about playing Call of Duty, and he’s talking about, ‘Aw yeah, I slit this guy in the throat and then I stuck a grenade up this guy’s ass.’ He’s describing it in all this detail, and that makes me uncomfortable. I don’t think that’s good for him.
You can’t bring tweezers on an airplane. If I’m on a plane and you try to hijack it with tweezers, I’ll whip your ass, man. You think I’m going to be late because you’ve got tweezers and a bad attitude?
Bend over to the front touch toes
Back dat ass up and down and get low (get low)
Back dat ass up and down and get low (get low)
You can never look that tough in glasses. … You never see somebody push up their glasses and say, “I’m gonna kick your ass.”
Writing is a sad process, sitting on your ass for many, many hours, alone in a room, smelling like coffee, sadness and bitterness, and watching your youth leave.
I haven’t had a drink in thirteen years, but occasionally I’m tempted to have one beer. The problem is that if I have that one beer, I wake up in Tijuana four days later with a tattoo and a sore ass.
You can’t take the heat, get ya ass out the kitchen
Matter fact, take ya ass back in there and wash the dishes.
Matter fact, take ya ass back in there and wash the dishes.
That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely.
The secret to happiness is to be working at your passion. If you want to be miserable, lead a desperate life like everybody else where they drag their asses to work everyday because they hate their job.
Basically, that’s why I wrote: to save my ass, to save my ass from the madhouse, from the streets, from myself.
It’s everything for me. Without figure skating, I am nothing.
I worry that I can come off smarmy. I wonder if I was listening to myself if I’d want to kick my own ass.
Peter Noever is a pain in the ass and a joy in the heart.
Can you imagine a 6 year old banging all day on a drum kit. I do have photos of me in my sort of princess girly bedroom with a bad-ass sparkle set.
I’m gonna kick your teeth so far down your throat you’ll be able to chew your own ass out for pissin’ me off.
There’s a boy across the river with an ass like a peach; alas I was no swimmer and lost my Clementine.
you boys can keep your virgins give me hot old women in high heels with asses that forgot to get old.
Learn the words of wisdom uttered by the wise and apply them in your own life. Live them – but do not a make a show of reciting them, for he who repeats what he does not understand is no better than an ass loaded with books.
Right now with blogs and the flood of internet access, a multitude of aspiring writers think they’re ready for prime time. They’re not. Be great. Read. Write. Bust your ass. Learn and find your voice. As hard as you think it is, it’s a hundred times harder.
This country of ours was built on violence;
If your ass got in the way, you was killed in silence.
And these been the ways since back in the days:
Just ask the Indians or the African slaves.
If your ass got in the way, you was killed in silence.
And these been the ways since back in the days:
Just ask the Indians or the African slaves.
Have I played the part well? Then applaud as I exit.
Those back-to-back experiences confirmed what I already knew: That I was a shitty-ass employee and I’d better start my own business.
When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell.
The soldiers kill suicide bombers. Think about that. When a guys whole thing in life is to kill himself and you get there first… you are halling ass my friends.
Scripture itself is not systematic; the New Testament shows the greatest variety. God has shown us that he can use any instrument. Balaam’s ass, you remember, preached a very effective sermon in the midst of his ‘hee-haws.’
Time machine… wouldn’t you like to travel through time? I would. I’d go back… mess with people. You know what I would do? I would go back to when my mom and dad were having sex, to have me. Ya’know, come in, spank my dad on the ass I’m your son from the future! Ahaha!
The eyes healed in a matter of a few days, as eyes heal quickly, mine just heal faster than anybody else. I was back in the strip club hours later rehabbing my eyes.
What’s so wonderful about business is that every time I start thinking I’m special, I get knocked on my ass.
As for my own truncated secondary education, my head was in the clouds as my mom would say, or if you asked my father, up my ass.
As a Dominican man, you’re socialized to be a playboy. You spend a lot of time being taught that women are important, but without the really positive framework of why. You figure out quickly it’s because of culo (ass). But there is a sense that it’s not that simple.
We all just want to sit on our ass.
You can’t help noticing an amazing ass. Pretty naked ladies will always get my attention. Revealingly dressed good-looking women will always get my attention, at least for a moment.
If you become a chef because you’re obsessed by becoming a celebrity, getting my ass kicked and working my nuts off the way I did in France and getting pushed around those kitchens wasn’t about becoming famous.
Underneath the forms of fiction and poetry, you can bet your ass the ground comes from someone’s actual life experience.
Just because I’m not coordinated doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass.
Look here: “Mo’ money, mo’ problems,” my ass.
You’s a naive cat if you still believe that.
You’s a naive cat if you still believe that.
You tell Anderson Silva that I’m coming over and I’m kicking down his backdoor and patting his little lady on the ass and I’m telling her to make me a steak, medium-rare just how I like it.
I’ve jammed enough things up my own ass just trying to come on any amphetamine based narcotic.
I’ll miss all my teammates.В I’ll miss Elvis (Andrus) and (Adrian) Beltre, Mitch (Moreland), Matt Harrison and [manager Ron] Washington.В To be honest with you, I hope they go 0-162.В I got friends, and I love my friends, but I hope they lose their ass.
The modern version of Buridan’s ass [a figurative description of a man of indecision] has a Ph.D., but no time to grow up as he is undecided between making a Leonardo da Vinci in the test tube or planting a Coca Cola sign on Mars.
I loved Jen Garner in Alias. I think there are similarities, but we’re definitely a very different show [Nikita]. I think it’s cool to have women who are strong, kicking some ass.
There was a sorry judge who lived at the Swan by himself. He got but little honor, and he got but little pelf [i.e. wealth], He drudged and judged from morn to night, no ass drudged more than he, And the more he drudged, and the more he judged, the sorrier judge was he.
You can’t be up the reader’s ass, as many a writer I think is – cute as hell, ingratiating as hell. But that’s not loving the reader in the right way. That’s toadying to the reader.
Among the planets of the arts, architecture is the dark side of the moon.
I’m just living my life. I’m incredibly disciplined and I work incredibly hard. I show up for things on time, I do my homework, and I work my ass off. I’ve had a lot of luck, but I work really, really hard.
Home is where you hang your architect.
We just got our ass beat by a much better team. It happens once in a while. Does every team win every game?
A good way to lose weight is to put salt on your ass and go to a petting zoo. But stay away from goats because I’ve seen them fornicate with a mail box.
If you buy something because it’s undervalued, then you have to think about selling it when it approaches your calculation of its intrinsic value. That’s hard. But if you buy a few great companies, then you can sit on your ass. That’s a good thing.
The simple and terrifying reality, forbidden from discussion in America, was that despite spending $600 billion a year on the military, despite having the best fighting force the world had ever known, they were getting their asses kicked by illiterate peasants who made bombs out of manure and wood.
Pretty much any given day, barring some major distraction, I get melodies coming to me. Lyrics don’t come quite as easily. So I’ve been inventing little projects and challenges to sort of kick my ass with the lyrics.
What color is the sky in your world Cena. You’re talking what Wrestlmania needs to be, but allow me to demenstrate what’s going to happen. The Rock laying boots to asses, from the rooder to the pooder. Cenation is going to be Cyalaternation!
I have sinned against my brother the ass.
Freud’s fanciful pseudo-explanations (precisely because they are brilliant) perform a disservice. Now any ass has these pictures available to use in “explaining” symptoms of an illness.
What is this world?–A term which men have got,
To signify not one in ten knows what;
A term, which with no more precision passes
To point out herds of men than herds of asses;
In common use no more it means, we find,
Than many fools in same opinions joined.
To signify not one in ten knows what;
A term, which with no more precision passes
To point out herds of men than herds of asses;
In common use no more it means, we find,
Than many fools in same opinions joined.
As far as guitar goes, it’s weird to have such a challenging activity in my life for so long – I love it. It kicks my ass every day.
I like those blow-up beds. “This becomes a full size bed in three minutes!” Well, a mattress kicks your ass. Zero seconds. “Yeah, but you can store this thing.” You can store a bed, too – in the bedroom.
I think it’s interesting, from a creative point of view, to have witnessed the loss of consciousness on a national level and on a cultural level – Bush had 91 percent support in the polls after 9/11. We wanted to kick some ass!
I was very impressed with Hanson’s performance. I thought that little drummer was a kick-ass drummer, and uh, that they sang great, I mean I didn’t know either, y’know, that these little boys, y’know, I was very impressed. I think they’ll probably be around in 20 years writing good songs, and being a great band.
If thou art rich, thou art poor; for, like an ass, whose back with ingots bows, thou bearest thy heavy riches but a journey, and death unloads thee.
In America, you don’t even have proper holidays. It’s really one of the most prosperous slave societies in history. People work their asses off all year long and get two weeks off! It’s incredible.
That’s a bust your ass shot through and through.
Emergency rooms will be used the way they were intended to be used: not for primary care, but for when the average freaky American get some strange object up his ass.
I like parties, but I don’t like piГ±atas because the pinata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey, there’s a donkey with some pizzazz. Let’s kick its ass.
I doubt very greatly, however, that you’ll kick my ass. But me and my ass will enjoy your efforts.
I would recommend that any writer get off their ass at least once and just try it. Directing is a completely different set of muscles. It also affects your writing because, once you start directing, you tend to write your scripts with directing in mind.
If you’re not in the arena also getting your ass kicked, I’m not interested in your feedback.
There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.
What is our recourse, Mr. Speaker? What is our remedy?
Boston is actually the capital of the world. You didn’t know that? We breed smart-ass, quippy, funny people. Not that I’m one of them. I just sorta sneaked in under the radar.
If life turns her back on you, grab her ass.
No matter who you are, where you’ve come from, what you’ve been through… You can make a difference in this world.
Sometimes I’m an ass, sometimes I’m sweet as peaches.
Sexy doesn’t have to come with the price tag of being dumb.
My back is too long or something because my ass is constantly hanging out.
How do blind people know when they’re done wiping their ass?
I came, I saw, and I KICKED Stone Cold’s ASS!
My own opinion is enough for me. And I claim the right to defend it against any consensus, any majority anywhere, any place, any time. And anyone who disagrees with this can pick a number, get in line and kiss my ass.
Man with all his shrewdness is as stupid about understanding by himself the mysteries of God, as an ass is incapable of understanding musical harmony.
In football you can make it if you’ve got the ‘I’m-going-to-get-up-off-the-ground-and-kick-your-ass’ attitude.
Everybody’s scared for their ass. There aren’t too many people ready to die for racism. They’ll kill for racism but they won’t die for racism.
Any work of architecture that does not express serenity is a mistake.
Architecture is like a mythical fantastic. It has to be experienced. It can’t be described. We can draw it up and we can make models of it, but it can only be experienced as a complete whole.
No flip flops for black dudes. I don’t care where you at. Wear some hot ass Jordans on the beach.
On Friday the 13th, April 2029, an asteroid large enough to fill the Rose Bowl as though it were an egg cup will fly so close to Earth that it will dip below the altitude of our communication satellites. We did not name this asteroid Bambi. Instead, we named it Apophis, after the Egyptian god of darkness and death.
Can an ass be tragic?–To perish under a burden that one can neither bear nor cast off? The case of the philosopher.
Military power wins battles, but spiritual power wins wars.
The desire to reach for the sky runs very deep in the human psyche.
When you’re superhot, you don’t have the time to enjoy being superhot, because you’re working your ass off. By the time we will actually have time to really go out and screw around, we won’t be hot anymore.
One time he (Cool Papa Bell) hit a line drive right past my ear. I turned around and saw the ball hit his ass sliding into second.
By outward show let’s not be cheated; An ass should like an ass be treated.
I never took it upon myself to change the world. And those contemporaries of mine who were going around falling for the idea that they were going to bring down the United States government and make a new world were just asses to me.
Sit a man on his ass with nothing to do but eat and the first thing that goes is his mind. It never fails.
No matter how hard I worked, whatever I accomplished was attributed to my looks. If you’re working your ass off, then you don’t want to be told that you only got whatever because of the way you look. It takes the heart out of you.
Why is it there are so many more horses’ asses than there are horses?
The arrival of a good clown exercises a more beneficial influence upon the health of a town than twenty asses laden with drugs.
If you don’t got endz, you won’t be gettin’ no skinz,
And if you don’t got money, you won’t scoop a honey.
If you don’t got cash, you won’t be gettin’ no ass,
And if you don’t got loot, you won’t be knockin’ no boots.
And if you don’t got money, you won’t scoop a honey.
If you don’t got cash, you won’t be gettin’ no ass,
And if you don’t got loot, you won’t be knockin’ no boots.
The Senate decided they will be smoke-free. They ordained that all public areas in the Senate are now smoke-free. However, the senators themselves will still be allowed to blow smoke up each other’s asses.
Burn the Louvre, and wipe your ass with the Mona Lisa. This way at least, God would know our names.
People are always like, Why did you and husband Carey Hart get back together? Well, we weren’t done. And now we have Willow, so we’ll never be done.
I was like, “Excuse me, guys. My ass is going to be facing this way. Do you mind maybe just standing over there during this take because something is going to happen.”
Sometimes, for principle, your gonna have to kick some ass.
Power, time, gravity, love. The forces that really kick ass are all invisible.
If only all our conflicts could be resolved with a few grunts and a smack in the ass.
Yes… a bulletproof vest.
I got it made the rest of my life, financially and in every other way. There’s nobody in the world like me. I’m getting out just in time. If I was twenty seven, I could still kick ass. I don’t have to beat Holmes. Why? I raised him, he worked three years as a sparring partner for me.
I’ve discovered that half the people would love to go into space and there’s no need to explain it to them. The other half can’t understand and I couldn’t explain it to them. If someone doesn’t know why, I can’t explain it.
When I was young, beautiful ancient statues were castrated, so that the eye might not be corrupted…. Nothing was gained, unless horses and asses had also been castrated.
The world is not the most pleasant place. Eventually, your parents leave you and nobody is going to go out of their way to protect you unconditionally. You need to learn to stand up for yourself and what you believe and sometimes, pardon my language, kick some ass.
Whatever you do, stay focused. Because any stuff is not going to last forever. Once you get a show at something, you gotta roll with it. You can’t sit on your ass. You better keep working. You better stay motivated.
And, there’s clearly not going to be any outside help coming, anytime soon. These people are going to have to figure out some way to get out of this situation, and they’re going to choose all sorts of crazy-ass strategies.
Losing builds character. You know who said that? A loser! Guy who got his ass stomped every day, basketball, football, baseball, lose, lose, lose and lose. All right, I’m talking about me.
The Germans have a word for it: Sitzfleisch. Staying power. Winning by sticking your ass to the seat and not leaving until after it’s over.
I’m an ass-kicking fat kid.
If you touch me, I said pleasantly, “I’ll provide you with the ability to see if you can heal yourself. Then we’d see how bad ass you really are.”
I’ve whipped the Harvard graduate’s ass. Nothing against Harvard – it’s a hell of a school – but there I was, twenty five yards behind, wrapped in leg irons, and I beat him.
This dance isn’t just about shaking your waist and your ass.
These last few years we’ve seen an unacceptable abuse of power, having a president whose priority is expanding his own power.
I smoke so much weed that you wouldn’t believe and I get more ass then a toilet seat.
A fire lit under my ass? Yeah, that’s true. No time to waste.
It was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass raping at airport security.
Boot Camp was great and very interesting. You got to use live rounds of ammunition and got to do a lot of crawling around with live rounds flying around you, so you really had to learn to keep your ass down – everything down for that matter.
Intellect in its effort to explain Love got stuck in the mud like an ass. Love alone could explain love and loving.
My sense is that file sharing started in predominantly white, middle- and upper-middle-cl ass young people who were native-born, who felt they were entitled to have something for free, because that’s what they were used to.
If he gimme the word then I’m flippin the bird & then I’m spinnin around & I’m grippin the burn
But my thoughts ran a wool-gathering; and I did like the countryman, who looked for his ass while he was mounted on his back.
I play a female Indiana Jones, a professor who hunts down precious objects, like a bowl that belonged to the Buddha. They tailored the role to me: I wanted to be smart, funny, and to kick some ass.
Congress is supposed to provide oversight, the voters are supposed to provide oversight. And you [the media] were supposed to provide oversight. That’s why you have special liberties and that’s why you have special protections.
Beauty and virtue: the most kissable ass in the world is no guarantee of good intentions.
If you’re getting paid more than me, I’m definitely more excited about this ass whoopin I’m gonna put down on you.
An ass may bray a good while before he shakes the stars down.
If you’re going through a dark period, remember that you’re not alone.
The proportionality of what has happened to America because of unemployment and housing makes everything else look like a flea on a dog’s ass.
You’re born absolutely free except for laws of nature, if you drink you get drunk, that’s a law, if you get old you die, that’s a law too; if you sit on a tack you will bleed from the ass, these are the only laws that you’re born with.
I’m just looking for things to steal [on working with great actors]. It’s like going back to acting school. When you’re around people that do it well and you get your head out of your ass, you can really learn something.
It doesn’t matter what kind of result will be in the end. I already win for myself.
Although an ass is tired, he continues to carry his burden; he is unmindful of cold and heat; and he is always contented; these three things should be learned from the ass.
Jiu-Jitsu for sure will save your ass, one way or another. Not necessarily a physical fight but also being able to deal with yourself, know about yourself, and really improve yourself as a whole.
The problem was, I was labeled as trouble – so I was like, ‘Trouble? I’ll show you trouble. You want trouble, well here it is!’ No matter what label they give you, the best thing you can do is prove them wrong.
I’m a woman in a man’s job and I don’t have the luxury of being an ass.
I’d like to think that when I sing a song, I can let you know all about the heartbreak, struggle, lies and kicks in the ass I’ve gotten over the years for being black and everything else, without actually saying a word about it.
I like people admitting they were complete stupid horses’ asses. I know I’ll perform better if I rub my nose in my mistakes. This is a wonderful trick to learn.
If you’re surrounded by idiots, you’re the unpopular one and the odd one out because idiots don’t like smart asses.
Somtimes I regret [that debut album was titled “Bad Azz” ], because people take it the wrong way. Everybody got a bad ways, and I’m a ‘Bad Ass’… whenever I’m not good, so that’s what I’m talkin’ about.
Sometimes the show needs that kick in the ass so being able to sing a Nirvana song kind of takes it there. I’ve grown up putting on extravagant shows with Girl Talk so when I’m playing I like to go nuts. After 30 minutes of pointing and clicking it’s nice to scream into a microphone for three minutes.
I don’t necessarily think of myself as a feminist, but I’m a whole person. I’m not just breasts or ass or thighs – I’m a whole being! And it just seems like women aren’t necessarily striving to be the whole of themselves.
If they [at the audition] don’t like the way you sound they won’t buy you anyway, ripped dress or no ripped dress, ass hanging out or no ass hanging out.
New York was fun as a kid. I loved to go walking. It was an adventure. I remember throwing my retainer into a garbage can one time and my mom yelling, “Get your ass over here now!” And I had to dig through the garbage and find my retainer.
Whenever I publish a book, I feel like a trapper caught by the Iroquois. They’re all lined up with Tomahawks, and the idea is to run through with your head down, and everybody gets to take a swing. They hit you in the head, the back, the ass, and the balls.
I was so high, I needed a stepladder to scratch my own ass.
That all you got, George?
I understand that, today, some developers are asking architects to design eye-catching, iconic buildings. Fortunately, I’ve not had that kind of client so far.
If you tell an ugly woman that she is beautiful, you offer her the great homage of corrupting the concept of beauty.
Patience is a flatterer, sir, and an ass, sir.
The higher the monkey climbs, the more he shows his ass.
She was superfly,
Curtis may have feeled her ass
Curtis may have feeled her ass
Pleasure is the carrot dangled to lead the ass to market; or the precipice.
That cyclone in Burma? That was just me doing the dance to that annoying ass song.
Maria Shriver is credited with helping Arnold win by standing by him despite allegations of groping. She had to stand by him cause Arnold had a vice grip on her left ass cheek.
When you think about it, there is really a fine line between being a proctologist and just being a perverted ass-freak. And according to the judge who sentenced me, that line is called a ‘medical degree’.
If a stranger taps you on the ass and says, “How’s the little lady today!” you will probably cringe. But if he’s an American, he’s only being friendly.
It’s hotter than a snake’s ass in a wagon rut.
I’ve gotten bored with jazz to the point where I wouldn’t mind something bad happening. Slapping hurts, but at some point it’ll wake you up. I feel like jazz needs a big-ass slap.
In Alien, Sigourney Weaver’s role was written for a man. In Salt, Angelina Jolie’s role was written for Tom Cruise. These things, when reversed, do prove to be just as exciting and entertaining with women in leading roles.
If you call me a new-age, airy-fairy, hippie-dippy airhead I will shove my crystals up your ass.
Methought I was enamour’d of an ass.
There’s no ‘dumb-ass’ vaccine.
I want a Goddamn strong statement on marijuana, I mean one that just tears the ass out of them. You know, its a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing marijuana is Jewish.
As an architect you design for the present, with an awareness of the past, for a future which is essentially unknown.
The Nazi signs have got to stop. If you’re in a peace march and the guy next to you has a sign saying that ‘Bush is Hitler,’ forget the peace thing for a second and beat his ass, because he is not Hitler.
Sell. Don’t apologize for it and don’t be afraid to beg with a positive, up-beat attitude. Tell prospects you want their business and you will kick ass once you’ve earned it. Have no shame, pride doesn’t pay the rent.
A man that hoards up riches and enjoys them not, is like an ass that carries gold and eats thistles.
How’s this for a headline? ‘French fries’.
I really don’t care if Stephanie enjoys kissing Kurt Angle. Or if Kurt Angle enjoys kissing Stephanie. Or hell, if Kurt Angle enjoys kissing Triple H! Cause as far as I’m
concerned all three of you can kiss my ass!
concerned all three of you can kiss my ass!
The Hamsters really kick ass – Slim is one of your greatest guitar players
That skull had a tongue in it, and could sing once: how the knave jowls it to the ground, as if it were Cain’s jaw-bone, that did the first murder! It might be the pate of a politician, which this ass now o’er-reaches; one that would circumvent God, might it not?
Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.
You think that you can hide; you think you can lay low?
I’ll roll up on your ass like Hawaii 5-0!
I’ll roll up on your ass like Hawaii 5-0!
Couple of artists got words for me, that’s never fun. They say it’s on when they see me, that day don’t ever come.
It’s just interesting how people relate my success when I would like to think that I worked my ass off for a reason and that it’s about the music and not because I was on a TV show.
I subscribe to the great George G. Scott quote, “All actors are in trouble. Directors who don’t help are a pain in the ass”. We all need help from directors. We are all equally insecure.
I have read more about Oprah Winfrey’s ass than I have about the rise of China as an economic superpower. I fear this is no exaggeration. Perhaps China is rising as an economic superpower because its women aren’t spending all their time reading about Oprah Winfrey’s ass.
Be loud, be pretty and keep their black-hatin’ asses in their chairs
He “wasn’t used to being criticized, and he never did get it through his head that’s what politics is all about. He was used to getting his ass kissed.”
My name is Reggie. I’m about kicking ass, I’m about taking names, and we’re about making games.
My acting wasn’t the best. But damn, my ass looked tight.
Women today leave the house in animal prints and six inch stilettos, what does that say? I’m going to church? They’re saying I want you to hang me by my tits from your ceiling and bite my ass. You know what I mean? That’s what it says to me anyway.
You can market your ass off, but if your product sucks, you’re dead.
Now, Bad Ass, you run your mouth about Summerslam. Well, here’s the situation. The Rock says this, if the Rock hits you he’ll kill you. If he misses, the wind behind the punch will give you pneumonia and you’ll die anyway, so the choice is yours, jabroni.
If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you.
Charting your own course isn’t just more necessary than ever before. It’s also much easier – and much more fun.
Duty is the essence of manhood.
A proper lady should be able to smile pretty, wear sequins like she means it, and kick a man’s ass nine ways from Sunday while wearing stiletto heels. If she can’t do that much, she’s not trying hard enough.
Writing and travel broaden your ass if not your mind and I like to write standing up.
Very often the opinion of the clients must be disregarded in their own interest.
Jeff Foxworthy is a legend. Every time I see his moustache it reminds me to wax my lip and every time I hear his jokes it reminds me to wipe my ass.
I’m a kind person, I’m kind to everyone, but if you are unkind to me, then kindness is not what you’ll remember me for
It is in that moment, when you really lay down your cards and see the relationship for what it was, that you’ll find the freedom to kick it in the ass and let it go.
Ok first things first I’ll eat your brains Then Imma start rockin gold teeth & fangs
My net worth, that net works. Keep my shooters out in Brooklyn where the Nets work.
Friends, haters, it’s Twitter poll time. What do you think most holds back justice and equality for women? All thoughts welcome!
The modern architect is, generally speaking, art’s greatest enemy.
Shut up before I drop yo ass off at Koreatown. Now hold on, America, don’t start writing no letters. I’m just kidding. But am I lying?
THE REASON I CAN BE 38 AND HAVE TWO KIDS AND WEAR A BIKINI IS BECAUSE I WORK MY ASS OFF. IT’S NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT’S NOT LUCK, IT’S NOT FAIRY DUST, IT’S NOT GOOD GENES. IT’S KILLING MYSELF FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF FIVE DAYS A WEEK, BUT WHAT I GET OUT OF IT IS RELATIVE TO WHAT I PUT INTO IT.
I feel more confident in being able to be funny if I’m comfortable with the people I’m around. When you’re friends with them, it just makes it all the better. Plus, shooting a movie, you’re sitting on your ass for hours at a time, so if you have somebody there to mess around with and have fun, then it’s great.
I don’t want people to kick my ass, I just want to get to a point where they can’t kick it.
There is always one person in the office that you want to whip their ass! If you don’t know who it is, it is probably you.
Walk tall, kick ass, learn to speak Arabic, love music and never forget you come from a long line of truth seekers, lovers and warriors.
I still have my “Anarchy in the UK” 7″ [ Sex Pistols single]. I’m sure it gave us a context to think about as well as a kind of kick in the ass. But we had all been playing for years at that point.
Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re an ass.
VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.
Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it’s on the outside of your ass?
We’ve dressed up in our best and are prepared to go down like gentlemen.
I think I was born to be a figure skater, I think it was fate, and I thank God for letting it happen.
You want mercy? Take your ass to church!
I almost resent the whole fashion thing. Good God- never wearing the same thing twice and all of those things. It’s a pain in the ass.
There’s an upside to the digital thing from my point of view because I find that I have access to all this wacky, weird-ass dance-music stuff that I just can’t go into a shop and buy on vinyl.
Well China, you got us. Phelps was doping – and he still beat you. He smoked the sticky-icky, and then he smoked your ass!
After all we’d been through, we still couldn’t take our heads from out of our asses or our hands from around each other’s throats.
It’s about getting off your ass and maximizing all the opportunities that life has to offer.
The man might have become a Power, but he preferred to remain an Ass.
I’m going to sprout wings out of my ass one day and fly around the world.
My sense of humor was a tool for me getting past my mother and father separating, my older brother having cerebral palsy, and the bullies in the schoolyard. I had to make them laugh to keep them off my ass. I brought that to my professional career.
I felt like I was definitely robbed, and I refuse to give any politically correct bullshit ass comment. I was the best new artist this year.
Talk to Bob Arum, cos he’s my man. Don King kiss my ass!
Slapped her then I asked her what’s my name. She said N-I-C, the president of the N-Y-C.
Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.
I’m always excited to carry more and more weight and responsibility within a story. It’s all about putting my time in and showing people that I’m good and responsible and, hopefully, kicking ass in every frame.
Attorney General John Ashcroft is in intensive care. He’s suffering from a severe case of pancreatitis, which they can’t really figure out because he’s not really a drinker. They think he might have picked up some type of infection while wiping his ass with the Bill of Rights.
You’re better off with a kick-ass half than a half-assed whole.
Take your ass to the barber shop. Tell the barber that you’re sick of looking like an asshole.
Imagine–the whole world wired to Harry Cohn’s ass!
I’ll let a mystery gas out of my blistery ass
Just to disrupt the misery of history class.
Just to disrupt the misery of history class.
We live in a time of renaissance … cities are coming back to life, after a long neglect.
What are you gonna do for a face when the baboon wants his ass back?
The Rock is going to lay the smacketh down on your candy ass!
You’re thinking I’m one of those wise-ass California vegetarians who is going to tell you that eating a few strips of bacon is bad for your health. I’m not. I say its a free country and you should be able to kill yourself at any rate you choose, as long as your cold dead body is not blocking my driveway.
I love training and I love being able to kick ass.
I’m a wealthy man now. I’ve got a flat, a car, I have enough money to buy food. I skate to make the people happy. If somebody skates to earn money, I don’t care. I skate for the people. Besides, it’s pleasant to supply Russia with gold medals.
I collaborate a little bit with different aspects of my own mind. I kick my own ass instead of kicking other people’s asses.
We’re grown ass men, you don’t need to be falling all over the place.
He who learns, and makes no use of his learning, is a beast of burden with a load of books. Does the ass comprehend whether he carries on his back a library or a bundle of faggots?
I learnt very early in life that whenever there is a choice between peace of mind and piece of ass, go for the former.
If you’re afraid to defend your convictions because you might get your ass kicked for it, you’re not really fit to advocate for them.
If you fall on concrete, that’s yo ass fault
I may have no idea what I’m talking about,” I said, a little ticked off now. “But we’re all a part of a minority waiting for a majority to pull their heads out of their asses.
I’ll be in hell before you start breakfast – let her rip!
Weightless is a great equalizer.
The ass will carry his load, but not a double load; ride not a free horse to death.
I am not surprised that the president of the United States called this a phony scandal. I’m not surprised Secretary Clinton asked, “What difference does it make?” I’m not even surprised that Jay Carney said Benghazi happened a long time ago. I’m just surprised at how many people bought it.
Pick something you love and work your ass off, no matter what people say.
What worries me though, is that after all those victories people don’t see me as a human being anymore. I am not a machine, I have a heart beating in my chest -not an engine, there’s blood in my veins- not oil. I know pain and fatigue. I can lose but I will strive to win everything.
The Grammys make me hate music, and certainly everyone in the ass-licking music industry.
An object should be judged by whether it has a form consistent with its use.
I’m more of a fantasy kind of person. I like movies. My favorite movie is ‘Kick Ass.’
I was a martial artist. So, for me to be able to do all of the fights is a blast. It’s so fun. It’s like dancing, but more bad-ass. I really enjoy doing it.
If someone says there’s a portal to hell under some rocks, you bet your ass I’m going to move them.
I like ruins because what remains is not the total design, but the clarity of thought, the naked structure, the spirit of the thing.
Everybody was telling me to sit my ass down. Everybody was telling me to get a real job. Everybody was asking me, “What are you doing? You’re ruining your life. You’re embarrassing your family.” That’s all I got. So you can’t listen to that. You have to listen to yourself.
I am a fan of whatever makes me laugh my ass off. If it happens to be a Jew joke, then it’s a Jew joke.
Look at me. I’m skinny, I have a big nose, no tits and no ass, but in a room full of beautiful women, I would still leave with the most gorgeous guy.
Most fighters are the most humble people in the world because they’ve gotten their ass kicked before.
I’m just worried that the technology I invented in that story [“The Pyramid and the Ass” ] will become real, and George W. Bush will be able to clone into a new body and be “re-elected” due to a clone-bill passed by him and his cronies. God forbid!
He wouldn’t talk to me for two months. I was like, ‘What an ass**le.’ Actors are used to getting their way and to treating women like objects. “[on Wesley Snipes after she reports he made unreturned passes at her]
I seen her on the ave, spotted her more than once. Ass so fat that you could see it from the front.
CUNNING, n. The faculty that distinguishes a weak animal or person from a strong one. It brings its possessor much mental satisfaction and great material adversity. An Italian proverb says: “The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses.”
I’m definitely a nerd. I’m a cool-ass nerd, but I am definitely a nerd.
Bite your teeth into the ass of life.
We have to let nature put what’s left together, and see what it can come up with to save our ass.
Hurry it up! I want to be in hell in time for dinner.
What is said behind my back is said to my ass.
She could have a Grammy I’d still treat her ass like a nominee.
You can’t ask a guy like me why [I performed]. I really wanted to fly through the air. I was a daredevil, a performer. I loved the thrill, the money, the whole macho thing. All those things made me Evel Knievel. Sure, I was scared. You gotta be an ass not to be scared. But I beat the hell out of death.
Joan of Arc should be played as a “pain in the ass” and how do I know she was a “pain in the ass”? … because they burn her at the end.
It’s gonna be okay, no matter how hard your rock bottom is, you can rise above it and you can come back.
Complainin’ to my lawyer how this rookie tried to frisk me…
Jealous of my jeep, I gave his badge to the chief,
And got his ass directin’ traffic in the heat for a week.
Jealous of my jeep, I gave his badge to the chief,
And got his ass directin’ traffic in the heat for a week.
The same Constitution that allows her the right, if she wants to, to sit there and say nothing, allows these groups the right to petition their government for redress.
Money will brainwash you and leave your ass mindless.
The secret to writing a screenplay is keeping your
ass in the chair.
ass in the chair.
If the law supposes that,’ said Mr Bumble…’ the law is an ass – an idiot.
I am one of those people who can’t help getting a kick out of life – even when it’s a kick in the teeth.
In my experience, Marines are gung ho no matter what. They will all fight to the death. Everyone of them just wants to get out there and kill. They are bad-ass, hard-charging mothers.
I don’t know why people hire architects and then tell them what to do.
Socrates, on being insulted in the marketplace, asked by a passerby, “Don’t you worry about being called names?” retorted, “Why? Do you think I should resent it if an ass had kicked me?
Whether it’s food or women, the ones on front street are supermodels. Big hair, big tits, big trouble, but the one you come home to is probably something like cavatelli and red sauce. She’s not screaming for attention because she knows she’s good enough even if your dumb ass hasn’t figured it out yet.
The crux of the biscuit is: If it entertains you, fine. Enjoy it. If it doesn’t, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that’s a bonus.
In a way, I am what they say I am. I am a hard-ass. I’m hard to get along with. Most of the time I’m moody. All that’s true. I got no problem with people saying that.
I hope you’re all Republicans.
If you can look at a crime where everything points to one answer and not see it, you’re a dumb-ass. And if you can look at the deficit and not see that the problem is that the rich stopped paying taxes, you’re a Republican.
Above all things, be not made an ass to carry the burdens of other men if any friend desire thee to be his surety, give him a part of what thou has to spare if he presses thee further, he is not thy friend at all.
When you see a blonde with great tits and a great ass, you say to yourself, ‘Hey, she must be stupid or must have nothing else to offer’, which maybe is the case many times. But then again there is the one that is as smart as her breasts look, great as her face looks… so people are shocked.
People just kind of associate me with kicking some ass.
If the Olympic champion doesn’t know how to jump quad, I don’t know. Now it’s not figure skating. Now it’s dancing.
If you want to kick the tiger in his ass you’d better have a plan for dealing with his teeth
I’d like to say I’m ready to kick ass and show the guys how it’s done. But I’m not here to prove anything about being a woman. I’m here to drive a race car and try to win a race.
Humans are born, weak and helpless. We’re cursed with natural predators called parents. That’s why the grandma was created. To protect us. Oh sure, she’s old and frail. But she can kick your dad’s ass.
Never do an enemy a small injury.
It’s not about going to church every week because you know there’s a lot of people who go to church all of the time who aren’t going to heaven. It’s not even about that, it’s not about kissing God’s ass, it’s about being aware.
Architecture, of all the arts, is the one which acts the most slowly, but the most surely, on the soul.
When we get out of this, I’m gonna shove my fist right into your ass, hard and fast Not in the sexual way! In the ‘I am pissed off’ sort of way.
Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something!
You have to hide what you are and it’s really stressful and very bad for your self esteem. Because it’s not obvious to people that you are ill, they treat you as if you’re a pain in the ass, then you beat yourself up and you are already beating yourself up as a part of mental illness.
Cyclists are a pain in the ass.
The last thing that the blues needs is another smart-ass white boy with an attitude.
Now I think liberals have gone from underreacting to Trump and saying that Trump is just a clown and a buffoon, and that Hillary Clinton’s going to kick his ass, to now overreacting, and saying, “Oh my God, 60 million people consciously endorsed a white supremacist for president.”
You lil Fraggle Rock, beat you wit a padded lock
Any stupid ass can die- you have to work at living!
Value yourself for what the media doesn’t – your intelligence, your street smarts, your ability to play a kick-ass game of pool, whatever. So long as it’s not just valuing yourself for your ability to look hot in a bikini and be available to men, it’s an improvement.
I’ll say this about the war protesters: At least most of them are only putting duct tape across their mouths so I can still tell the rest of them to blow it out their ass.
THE ONLY GOOD THING IS MY FANS LIKE ME AND COME TO SEE ME AND THATS ALL THAT MATTERS. EVERYBODY ELSE CAN KISS MY ASS. IF THEY DONT LIKE MY POLITICAL INCORRECTNESS THEN THEY CAN KEEP THEIR UPTIGHT P C ASS AWAY FROM MY SHOW. ITS THAT EASY.
I have taken your advice and the names used are anode cathode anions cations and ions the last I shall have but little occasion for. I had some hot objections made to them here and found myself very much in the condition of the man with his son and Ass who tried to please every body.
In the movie, the stars above the ship bear no correspondence to any constellations in a real sky. Worse yet, while the heroine bobs… we are treated to her view of this Hollywood sky-one where the stars on the right half of the scene trace the mirror image of the stars in the left half. How lazy can you get?
Work your ass off. Don’t be an asshole.
As I grow older, I put all life’s bulls**t aside. I think the process of the laying off of the bulls**t starts around 40. Before that, most men have their heads stuck in their ass. After 40, you see things differently. You’ve found yourself. You’re accepting yourself and what you got from life.
The person who’s in the Zen monastery, who’s doing a kind of poor job at meditating and a half-ass job cleaning the gardens is not doing very good yoga.
You look at material a different way when your ass is on the line financially for it. You want to know where the big laughs are, and how we’re going to sell this.
Kyle Busch is going to get his ass whipped shortly I hope. He better sit his ass in his motor home or I’m going to come find him and he’s going to have to hold my watch because I’m going to whip his ass. He’s the biggest whining little piece of [expletive] I’ve ever seen in my whole life.
I don’t know any woman in France who doesn’t talk to firemen and smile at them, because they’re always so sweet, and they’re wearing those tight pants. Even my dad looks at their ass when they walk down the street!
Beware the lessons of a fighter pilot who would rather fly a slide rule than kick your ass!
In the first place, any group of folks willing to make asses of themselves in pursuit of a good time should be commended and encouraged: The spirit of human frolic needs all the help it can get.
I’ve always said that I want to play a neo-femme action star, and I kind of got to do that in this movie-of-the-week called “Wyvern,” where I got to shoot a gun and be a little bad-ass, but I’d like to do that even further. I’m dorky myself. I’ll play “Zelda” for 10 hours.
I’m about to enter a national ass-kicking contest. With no legs. And a massive ass.
It startled him even more when just after he was awarded the Galactic Institute’s Prize for Extreme Cleverness he got lynched by a rampaging mob of respectable physicists who had finally realized that the one thing they really couldn’t stand was a smart-ass.
When I run into a paradox I think either I’m a total horse’s ass to have gotten to this point, or I’m fruitfully near the edge of my discipline. It adds excitement to life to wonder which it is.
Is your head up your ass so far that you can’t pull it out?
I have a job to pay attention. It is my number one duty as a human being – to earn an experiment in self-government every day by spotlighting cockroaches who violate their oath to the US constitution and wipe their ass with the US Constitution.
I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
I don’t want idiots in my audience. So if me coming forward with what my beliefs are is what you need to hear to not be a fan anymore, that’s great. That means next time I show up in whatever said city, your dumb ass won’t be there.
When finding the right angle for a shot…’Move your ass.’
The culture war in America can best be described by the battle between workin’ hard, playin’ hard s – tkickers that bust our ass to make America strong by earning our own way and kickin’ maximum ass versus soulless weaklings who have been brainwashed into thinking they are entitled to a free ride.
My life is gardening, cleaning around the house and power washing. I power wash everything: my wife, the mailman with the f-cking mail, power wash his ass, f-ck my mail up, I don’t care.
There comes a day when you’ve become comfortable in your skin. But God as my witness, I am going to try to do everything I can to keep this ass together for as long as I possibly can – without going against nature.
Some people think a song without words isn’t a real song. Tell that to Beethoven and he’ll kick your ass!
I’m waiting for my kids to grow up and get into the Offspring and look at me like I’m a total candy-ass.
Get off your ass and do something. All you need is the right inspiration. Anger has fueled me my entire life. It makes me feel good and… I’m okay with that. My fear is that my anger will one day make me so damned successful that I’ll actually be happy. And then I’ll just stop.
Women have been kicking ass for centuries.
Obstinacy and dogmatism are the surest signs of stupidity. Is there anything more confident, resolute, disdainful, grave and serious than an ass?
Marijuana is rejected all over the world. Damned. In England heroin is alright for out-patents, but marijuana? They’ll put your ass in jail. I wonder why that is? The only reason could be: To Serve the Devil – Pleasure! Pleasure, which is a dirty word in Christian culture.
I think the one thing I would point to as a primary reason, basically, is that I was a gigantic ass, … It’s the first time I got dumped in my life.
If you’re trying to get somebody and this might be the only time you’re going to catch him, but he is holding his baby and with his mama, you ain’t gonna let that chance go by. That’s the mentality of the streets. If you let that chance go by, he might catch your ass.
Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don’t do it. One day I’m gonna, though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That’s ridiculous, but it’s true. I always fight with wearing a beret.
You can’t tell somebody to kiss your ass on a scooter!
A person whodoes not regard music as a marvelous creation of God, must be a clodhopper indeed and does not deserve to be called a human being; he should be permitted to hear nothing but the braying of asses and the grunting of hogs.
Get your assets working for you so that your “ass” isn’t working for someone else.
Hey, lady, those are some sexy-ass extensions. I guess you wont mind if I extend to you a personal invitation to party with me one-on-one in a scary motel room.
Bradley Cooper was an asshole, but he was – like Sidney Lumet, like George Clooney – the nicest guy in the world. I sound like the biggest ass-kisser ever. But I’m telling the truth, I swear to God!
Some in management positions operate as if they are in a tree of monkeys. They make sure that everyone at the top of the tree looking down sees only smiles. But all too often, those at the bottom looking up see only asses.
My father wanted me to play pro football, and he didn’t like the fact that I’d left school. And he said, “It takes a man to play football. And any fool can go up on the stage and make an ass of himself.
When I got a chance to rap, I just busted my ass. When I got a chance to act, I busted my ass. Anytime I get a chance. I’m not wasting time. I won’t do it if I’m not doing it 110 percent. You’ve got to work hard if you want to play hard. I like to play, but I know I gotta bust my ass.
Me and success are two things you don’t wanna find yo ass between. Back against the wall like plasma screens.
If you think you can’t, you’re right.
If I had one wish I would ask for a big enough ass for the whole world to kiss.
If you just write the kinds of stories you think others will want to read, you’ll be competing with cartoonists who are far more enthusiastic for that kind of comic than you are, and they’ll kick your ass every time.
Now, get out there and kick ass!
Certain nights, when everything’s perfect and we have thousands of people partying their asses off, I break my rule and have a drink onstage. I’ve never done a show drunk. Well, I take that back. In the early days I did.
Never trust nobody, your moms will set your ass up.
But we have to understand why we do what we do, not just do what we do. Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.
Everybody wants to know what I’m on. What am I on? I’m on my bike busting my ass six hours a day. What are you on?
Give me the enchilada with the pickle sauce shoved up between the donkey’s ass until he can’t come anymore.
You beef wit me, I’m-a even the score equally. Take you on Jerry Springer and beat your ass legally.
It is idle to play the lyre for an ass.
My struggle and my story is very much so somebody that was just kind of [an] underdog. I didn’t have any cosigns, I wasn’t even really good at rap, I’m one of those dudes that was never just crazy and amazing, I had to work my f***ing ass off to get good at this stuff.
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
Mick Jagger’s lips’ so big, black people be going, “You got some big-ass lips!”
In the face of the economic plight, it is our task to become pioneers of simplicity, that is, to find a simple form for all of life’s necessities, which is at the same time respectable and genuine.
If you got the balls to follow something through, you can end up being the coolest, smartest guy in the room, because you’ve literally put your ass on the line.
To be engrossed by something outside ourselves is a powerful antidote for the rational mind, the mind that so frequently has its head up its own ass.
Imma violate yall asses like Chris Stokes.
The only thing worse than starting something and failing… is not starting something.
Whether I sound like Sammy or not is purely coincidence. You have got to hand it to him, he sings his ass off. There is no moss on that stone.
Here, then, is what I wanted to tell you of my architecture. I created it with courage and idealism, but also with an awareness of the fact that what is important is life, friends and attempting to make this unjust world a better place in which to live.
Sitting still is a pain in the ass.
Preposterous ass, that never read so far to know the cause why music was ordain’d! Was it not to refresh the mind of man, after his studies or his usual pain?
As an artist, that’s our job – to be with you in times of celebration and when the world is kicking your ass.
You’re kind of a smart ass when you’re not flat on your face.
Sometimes when we get our ass kicked and we’re down, sometimes we stay down, and sometimes we get depressed and sometimes we don’t know how to handle it, and sometimes we don’t know what’s going on, and sometimes we feel like it’s not worth going on.
I’d like to thank my family for loving me and taking care of me. And the rest of the world can kiss my ass.
I really enjoy theater. I just went to see ‘Death of a Salesman,’ and it knocked me on my ass.
I remember my agent at the time called me and was like, “I’ve got it! I’ve found it! I’ve found your role!” I worked my ass off to get that role, because I think me and three or four other girls tested for it. But it was a great time.
Acid, booze, and ass, needles, guns, and grass, lots of laughs.
My ass is definitely higher than it was when I was 20. This is the thing that people don’t understand – take care of your body [and it will] get better! It gets better as I get older.
Every bad decision I’ve made has been based on money. I grew up in the projects and you don’t turn down money there. You take it, because you never know when it’s all going to end. I made Cop III because they offered me $15 million. That $15 million was worth having Roger Ebert’s thumb up my ass.
Anyone can see that an ass laden with books remains a donkey. A human being laden with the undigested results of a tussle with thoughts and books, however, still passes for wise.
I’ve done tangos with men who thought my ass was a squeaky toy.
Mr Speaker, I withdraw my statement that half the cabinet are asses – half the cabinet are not asses.
Critics must excuse me if I compare them to certain animals called asses, who, by gnawing vines, originally taught the great advantage of pruning them.
Owning a business is NOT about working your ass off for the sake of trying to squeeze out a living.В It is NOT about making tons of money at the expense of losing tons of life.В It IS about maximizing life, bettering your life and the lives of others, which, not so ironically, fattens your purse.
I’m grown ass man and grown ass men can do whatever they want, got it?
We don’t know our ass from a hole in the ground.
The thing that’s weird is that we thought it was funny. We expected people to get the joke – that we [with Andrew Ridgeley] were two guys really making asses of ourselves.
I don’t think we should really be judging on Chris Brown like that until we know what Rihanna did. We all got reasons for what we do. Look at me. I’m one of the top 10 performers of all-time. I had to beat this one mermaid ass in a seafood restaurant over some shrimps. No lie. You just never know.
The Carpetbaggers was the first big money I made. Money gave me a lot of freedom, but no matter how much you make there’s always somebody chasing your ass for more.
You want flowers, I’ll buy your ass a rose,
But later on you’re comin’ out them pantyhose.
But later on you’re comin’ out them pantyhose.
At a certain age, you have to choose between your face and your ass.
I’m just as famous as my mentor… but that’s still the boss don’t get sent for
Adrian had always found it amusing that a guy could be drilling Stacia up her ass while she considered herself to be a virgin. Her intent had been to present herself as such when she found “Mr. Right.”
After watching mulattas shake it, I can totally understand why Brazil is devoted to my favorite body part, the ass.
My parents joined in the 60s and at that time it was really important – there was a group mentality. I could be pulling this out of my ass, but I feel our generation approaches things on a more individual basis, like we’re more personal and don’t need to be a part of a group.
A man’s personality is matured only when he appropriates the truth, whether it is spoken by Balaam’s ass or a sniggering wag or an apostle or an angel.
You could smell my ass from mars.
I just want everyone to know I’m suing Ruben Studdard. He had his hand on my ass and he wouldn’t let go.
If you really want to make a change, just get up off your ass and do it.
Songs are puzzles – you get an intro, or maybe an end, but you gotta fill in the rest. Sometimes they come easy and sometimes they’re a pain in the ass.
There are braying men in the world, as well as braying asses; for what is loud and senseless talking any other than away of braying?
When a woman says nothing’s wrong, that means everything’s wrong. And when a woman says everything’s wrong, that means everything’s wrong! And when a woman says something’s not funny, you’d better not laugh your ass off!
Just because we are wearing lipstick doesn’t mean we can’t kick your ass!
You don’t know your ass from a hole in the ground, you know that?
I was hanging out in gers [yurts] with these Kazakh sort of Bedouins. Drank nasty-ass camel milk. The drive [from the Souther Gobi to Ulan Bator] is insane. It’s like The Road.
I suggest taking the high road and have a little sence of humour and let things roll off your back. I think that’s very important.
Some age. Others mature.
Love is more powerful than kicking ass.
Destiny is what you are supposed to do in life. Fate is what kicks you in the ass to make you do it.
History tells us what works in the gym, and everything else walks down the road with a carrot in its ass.
The Backstreet Boys can sing their asses off. I’m not so sure about those other boy bands. But Backstreet Boys have my ultimate respect.
Everything in this country [the US] has got to be good looks and unlined faces and thin bodies and people running around in skirts slit up to their ass. It has nothing to do with thinking or with being a human being. There is life in mature people; it’s not all over at 24ВЅ.
When being a stunt double, my job has always a supportive role, which is interesting, really. Part of what I really like about it is making a situation where people can just come out of their shell and be super bad-ass. That’s exciting!
I tried football and got my ass beat. I tried baseball, and the ball knocked out one of my teeth.
I have a policy about honesty and ass-kicking, which is, if you ask for it, then I have to let you have it.
I may not dress like Satan anymore, but I’m still down with the Devil and I will go medieval on your ass.
We do need knowledge. And perhaps in a thousand years we might pick smaller cliffs to jump off. The books are to remind us what asses and fools we are.
The thirst for knowledge is like a piece of ass you know you shouldn’t chase; in the end, you chase it just the same.
Boys don’t make passes at female smart asses.
I just look at a bagel and my ass gets bigger!
Tell the negative committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.
I am the best damn ass-kicker in the whole U.S. Army!
I’ve got a good man. He takes care of me. I don’t have to be scared of anything because I know he will kick every ass… disrespect him and you’ve got a problem.
The older I got, the more apparent it became that my mother was losing control over me. She fought back fiercely with black moods, silent treatments and martyrdom. And, of course, all she did was run my ass out of the house even quicker. The pressure was unbearable.
Mitt Romney we think is going run again. He says he has no plans to run, but he said if he did run, this time things would turn out differently. Yes they would. This time he would get his ass kicked by a woman.
Aren’t you going to ask me how it went, Kitten?” “You walked in and took the stairs one at a time,” I answered. “And you haven’t barked at me to get in the car, so I take it Majestic didn’t tell you our asses were trophies for hunting season. Am I wrong?
If a president can change some laws, can he change ALL laws? Can he change election laws? Can he change discrimination laws? Are there any laws, under your theory, that he actually HAS to enforce?
There’s a voice inside of me that I know people will relate to; I just haven’t really had the opportunity to let it flourish. To sit there and explain to a guy what it’s like to be a kick-ass woman is hard. I think there’re only a handful of directors out there that get it.
First comes the cash, then comes the ass, then come big blunts with chunks of hash.
Aficionado my ass…I just love to smoke cigars
I had to stop drinking alcohol, because I used to wake up nude in front of my car with my keys in my ass.
Is there anything so grave and serious as an ass?
My words of encouragement for teen girls suffering with eating disorders, self-harm, anything… is to get help. It’s the most important thing you can do for yourself, and it can change your life and potentially save your life.
Truly creative people care a little about what they have done, and a lot about what they are doing. Their driving focus is the life force that surges in them now.
writing = ass + chair
Most sportswriters don’t know their ass from a hole in the ground.
I am a God, so hurry up with my damn massage; in a French-ass restaurant, hurry up with my damn croissants.
You’re just a little too hip for the room. It’s not good to be too hip because two hips make an ass.
I’m a perfectionist. It’s a big pain in the ass and it takes a lot of my time, but it really is going well and I have to do my own things.
Investing is where you find a few great companies and then sit on your ass.
Life is like a cucumber. One minute it’s in your hand, the next it’s up you ass.
Obstinacy and heat in argument are surest proofs of folly. Is there anything so stubborn, obstinate, disdainful, contemplative, grave, or serious, as an ass?
If something’s bugging my ass on any particular day, I’m probably going to say something about it, but I’m not going to go on a tirade.
I’d say people get to work and start being more understanding of everybody – instead of calling everybody names, start being more understanding. But get in there and get it done. Kick ass and take names. And this may be my dad talking, but don’t spend what you don’t have.
I may sound like a megalomaniac, but I feel like I’m equipped to become a great, memorable comedian, if I keep working my ass off and staying at the pace I’m at, and I feel a responsibility to do that because of the women who have done it before me, and the ones who need to do it after me.
This dope money here is Lil Treys scholarship
Cause aint no to tuition for havin no ambition
And aint no loans for sittin your ass at home
Cause aint no to tuition for havin no ambition
And aint no loans for sittin your ass at home
Being a dominatrix, sticking my foot up people’s asses for money, necessitated that I divorce myself from any sort of objective perspective on what I was doing. In order to think about things as a writer you have to objectify your experience. I couldn’t have been enacting that experience if I was objectifying it.
If I were an animal, I’d probably be a bald eagle, since I’m already bald and I love to fish. But I’d probably be a shaky-ass eagle because I’m afraid of flying.
The men are much alarmed by certain speculations about women; and well they may be, for when the horse and ass begin to think and argue, adieu to riding and driving.
Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn’t make you spiritual. It’s right above the crack of your ass, and it translate to beef with broccoli. The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren’t pregnant. You’re not spiritual. You’re just high.
I don’t want to be grotesque, but when you’re 330 pounds, it’s hard to wipe your a-. You know?
I’ll open up a can of whoop-ass on you!
I’m in favor of an art that does something other than just sit on its ass in a museum.
At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks as long as you’re happy.
If Britney Spears would paint her ass green, I’m sure you would spot green asses all over L.A., as soon as the word was out.
I feel more productive, mostly because I feel like my ass is on the line. Before I had kids, I would sit around, drink, I don’t even know what I did with myself.
It’s hard to kiss the lips at night that chew your ass out all day long…
But this is the kind of ass-clownery that stems from the fact that all philosophy looks weird when you don’t have one.
The wedding vows are a license to be a complete jerk, with full knowledge that the person you married has agreed, no matter how large a horse’s ass you are, to stay by your side until death. A fool could tell you this is a bad deal.
Spendin all the money I just worked my ass off for doing things that I won’t regret.
God, I’ve frozen my ass off painting snow scenes!
I’m not a real vocal guy, but sometimes you need to kick someone in the ass.
McCartney! Haven’t met him and haven’t played with him. I would LOVE to. He needs to make a kick-ass rockabilly record.
I don’t particularly dislike any kind of person that might be reading my stuff. They like it and that’s cool, but I don’t do the work for any kind of group in particular, except for hobos, who just plain kick ass and light up my life.
Gettin at Weezy you comin through me-zy & I won’t hesitate to do anyone greasy
It’s darker than a well diggers ass.
A burro is an ass. A burrow is a hole in the ground. As a journalist you are expected to know the difference.
You know, in the oath that brand-new citizens take, it contains six different references to ‘the law.’ If it’s good enough for us to ask brand-new citizens to affirm their devotion to the law, is it too much to ask that the president do the same?
This stone is flawless F1 I keep shooters up top in the F1
Secretly everybody’s getting tired of political correctness, kissing up. That’s the kiss-ass generation we’re in right now. We’re really in a pussy generation. Everybody’s walking on eggshells. We see people accusing people of being racist and all kinds of stuff. When I grew up, those things weren’t called racist.
I’ve always appreciated people like Graham Parker or Loudon Wainwright III, who spend their entire lives writing songs and working their asses off just to have complete artistic freedom. They’re just sharing their lives with you through their music. That’s the same kind of work that I’m trying to do, in my own weird way.
Scobe’s Tenth Law: In all endeavors, in all aspects of life, there are more horses asses than horses!
Pain was their body’s way of telling them that they’d pushed themselves to their limits – which was exactly where they were supposed to be.
When this war is over, the Japanese language will be spoken only in hell!
Faith is rarely where your head is at. Nor is it where your heart is at. Faith is where your ass is at!
I’m here to chew gum and kick some ass, and I’m all out of gum.
Real gangster-ass Nerdfighters don’t run from nothing… ’cause real gangster-ass Nerdfighters can’t run fast.
The moment the door opened I knew an ass-kicking was inevitable. Whether I’d be giving it or receiving it was still a bit of a mystery.
Develop a built-in bullshit detector.
God really exists, I tell you like this:
It resides inside.
And anybody tell you different,
Just selling you religion,
Tryin’ to keep your ass in line.
It resides inside.
And anybody tell you different,
Just selling you religion,
Tryin’ to keep your ass in line.
I’ve always wanted to be an action heroine. That’s a chick dream, getting to wear a leather bodysuit and be blonde and kick ass.
In certain countries, people seem to be think that three asses together make one intelligent person. However, that is completely wrong. Several asses in concreto make the ass in abstracto and that is a most terrifying animal.
I had a rule about stilettos, and it was this: I didn’t wear them unless I planned to kick ass in them. Stilettos were for striding and sauntering, never sulking.
People think, ‘Wow, you’re an actress, so people must be really nice to you and kiss your ass.’ NOBODY kisses my ass.
A man searching for enlightenment is like a man sitting on an Ass in search of an Ass
I did but prompt the age to quit their clogs
By the known rules of ancient liberty,
When straight a barbarous noise environs me
Of owls and cuckoos, asses, apes and dogs.
By the known rules of ancient liberty,
When straight a barbarous noise environs me
Of owls and cuckoos, asses, apes and dogs.
To provide meaningful architecture is not to parody history, but to articulate it.
We want all our friends to tell us our bad qualities; it is only the particular ass that does so whom we can’t tolerate.
A lot of social media saved my ass, so I’m totally for it.
I’ve gotten burnt the last few years on a couple of little independent films where you get paid nothing, you work your ass off, there’s no marketing budget except you going on every talk show. But you’re seeing it all over. I mean, these disasters at NBC, with the morning show.
Tiger Woods is a billionaire. Do you know how much ass you can get with a billion dollars? I know guys with $20 and a pack of Newports who’d try to screw your whole neighborhood.
I’m a grown-ass man. I can’t be, like, ordering people to put down their phones.
Honey, Kate is not going to die sooner because you have one more glass of mine, or because you stay overnight in a hotel, or because you let yourself crack up at a bad joke. So sit your ass back down and turn up the volume and act like you’re a normal person.
I want to dance, I want her ass. Why is she ignoring me?
You want ass? The cash is first.
You got dead presidents, baby, I got a hearse in my purse.
You got dead presidents, baby, I got a hearse in my purse.
You know how ESPN works; they’ll throw themselves into a frenzy over Tebow’s white bread lame ass niceness and then vilify Johnny Football just ’cause he rages now and then.
The feeble howl with the wolves, bray with the asses, and bleat with the sheep.
[On being overweight:] If I tried to haul ass, I would have to make two trips.
I like flawed characters very much. A lot of times I get asked to do parts that are kind of small but key – three-scene roles that are three kick-ass scenes. Growing up, watching as many movies as I did, I was always into character actors like that.
Dude that was bad ass.
How’s his appendix?””Like crap. They almost didn’t catch it in time, and he’s still doing the ass-plant in a hospital bed, beingdoted on by an army of hot nurses. Makes me sick.””Maybeyou should rupture something.””Any more of these stories out of you and I just might.
To experience the good you have to have seen the bad; plus it makes you appreciate blessings more. Tough times taught me to be a fighter.
I’m not defending what Cory Booker said. I’m saying I understand why he has to kiss the asses of the rich people on Wall Street, because there’s no other way to keep his city afloat.
Political cartoons are the ass-end of the artform
There isn’t anything good to say about Kick-Ass 2, the even more witless, mirthless follow-up to Kick-Ass.
There needs to be more variety on television so young girls growing up don’t feel pressured to look one specific way. Tall, thin, curvy, short, whatever you are, you are beautiful.
Members of Congress are incredibly blessed and fortune to have the jobs that we have. Nobody makes us run. Every two years we offer for public office, and if you don’t want to do it then don’t run. But the notion that you can make $174,000 in this country and be underpaid is laughable.
I think the American public wants a solemn ass as a president, and I think I’ll go along with them.
Furiously and gorgeously write your ass off.
You can’t spell bass without ass
Damn it, there are so many idiots whose asses I have to kick! I’ll have to start carrying a list just to keep track of ’em all!
Just keep coming home to yourself, you are the one who you’ve been waiting for.
You punch like you take it up the ass.
Love with your mouth shut, help without breaking your ass or publicizing it: keep cool, but care.
You the type that be runnin ya mouth. See you on the block wanna run in ya house.
