Koalas Quotes

Koalas Quotes by Mitch Hedberg, Rob Thurman, Ridley Pearson, Milo, Steve Irwin, Todd Barry and many others.

My apartment is infested with koala bears. It's the cut

My apartment is infested with koala bears. It’s the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light a bunch of koala bears scatter. But I don’t want ’em to, you know, I’m like “Hey, hold on, fellas. Let me hold one of you. And feed you a leaf.”
Mitch Hedberg
Pooh hater,’ I muttered under my breath. ‘Winnie-the-Pooh was not a koala–why am I even arguing about this with you?
Rob Thurman
Especially with four insanely angry, sword-carrying pirates bearing down on you, followed closely by an alien with a genetic malfunction that posed like Elvis Presley and looked slightly like a cross between a koala and a cuddly dog.
Ridley Pearson
I’d love to hold a koala. They sleep 22 hours a day, eat eucalyptus leaves and just hang out. I want to spend some time with that guy
I have no fear of losing my life – if I have to save a koala or a crocodile or a kangaroo or a snake, mate, I will save it.
Steve Irwin
I liked the koala, wallaby, and I chilled with a kangaroo a bit. There was a wombat that I quite enjoyed also
Todd Barry
I did find out about the koalas and how eucalyptus makes them high and why they sleep all day. They’re little druggies.
Kristen Bell
I’ve thought about living the koala’s life, but you may need to petition the government quarantine rules to make it happen. Quarantine would make me extra grumpy.
Grumpy Cat
You are my koala bear, and I am your tree.
Zoe Sugg
I must have been a koala in my past life.
Miranda Kerr
My favourite animal is the koala, but his life would be boring. I would rather be a giraffe so that I could contemplate the beauty of Africa.
Caterina Murino
I want to go to Australia and take the same goofy picture of me holding a koala that everyone else takes.
Jessi Klein
I hate having long hair. It’s like walking around with a dead koala on your back!
Russell Crowe
Americans need bullshit the way koala bears need eucalyptus leaves. They’ve become totally addicted to it. They get so much of it back home that they can’t survive without it.
Michael Moorcock
Does koala bear poop smell like cough drops?
Tom Robbins
By 1914, the royal families of Europe were inbred to the point of pantomine. You feel about them as you do about koalas. Nothing so stupid has any right to exist on the planet. On the other hand, they are rather cute, and in grave danger of extinction due to their specialised needs.
Nancy Banks-Smith
I am sentimental,’ she said. ‘I could dissect a koala but not its baby. I like the words damozel, eglantine, elegant. I love when you kiss my elongated white hand.
Vladimir Nabokov