Landlord Quotes

Landlord Quotes by Mitch Hedberg, Richard Cobden, David Ricardo, John Quincy Adams, Webster Tarpley, James Connolly and many others.

I hate dreaming because when you want to sleep, you wan

I hate dreaming because when you want to sleep, you want to sleep. Dreaming is work. Next thing you know, I have to build a go-cart with my ex-landlord.
Mitch Hedberg
The landlords are not agriculturists; that is an abuse of terms which has been too long tolerated.
Richard Cobden
I have endeavoured to show that the ability to pay taxes depends, not on the gross money value of the mass of commodities, nor on the net money value of the revenue of capitalists and landlords, but on the money value of each man’s revenue compared to the money value of the commodities which he usually consumes.
David Ricardo
I inhabit a weak, frail, decayed tenement; battered by the winds and broken in on by the storms, and, from all I can learn, the landlord does not intend to repair.
John Quincy Adams
The Austrian School came into existence when a bunch of Viennese rent-gouging landlords didn’t want rent control on the rents they could gouge out of their tenants in old Vienna, so they hired a bunch of scribblers – and that’s the Austrian School.
Webster Tarpley
Irish tory employers hid[e] their sweatshops behind orange flags, and Irish home rule landlords us[e] the green sunburst of Erin to cloak their rack-renting in the festering slums of our Irish towns.
James Connolly
I don’t assume that I am going to be cast as a Glaswegian landlord.
Julian Ovenden
I met a landlord who will pay you to move at the end of the week and let you use his van. That’s a really nice kind of eviction. I met a landlord who will take your door off. There are 101 ways to move a family out.
Matthew Desmond
Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives… and to the “good life”, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be.
Hunter S. Thompson
God is the great janitor of the universe. Why things don’t work is that we have a janitor in charge, and we keep looking for the landlord.
Richard Kadrey
In no state in America is it legal for a landlord to demand their tenants lead a “healthy lifestyle” in order to rent property.
Mallory Ortberg
I think sometimes when you go to a space you might like it, but the landlord is expecting something different from you. Our concept is very specific to us, so we need to have the freedom of doing it.
Dominique Crenn
We lived in so many flats, and the more people you could get, the cheaper the flat was. Someone was always sleeping in the living room, and you’re always slightly hiding them when the landlord came round.
Nicola Walker
Elites play the role today that landlords played under feudalism. They levy interest and financial fees that are like a tax, to support what the classical economists called “unproductive activity.”
Michael Hudson
There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: “You can’t eat your own food in here.” So they swapped sandwiches.
Frank Carson
If you have someone who is paying 88 percent of her income on rent, and we have laws that allow a landlord to evict a tenant who falls behind under those circumstances, eviction becomes an inevitability.
Matthew Desmond
A gardener who cultivates his own garden with his own hands, unites in his own person the three different characters, of landlord, farmer, and labourer. His produce, therefore, should pay him the rent of the first, the profit of the second, and the wages of the third.
Adam Smith
As I was saying to the landlord only this morning: ‘You can’t have everything’.
Dorothy Parker
Daylight is nobody’s friend. God comes in like a landlord and flashes on his brassy lamp.
Anne Sexton
We are only tenants, and shortly the great Landlord will give us notice that our lease has expired.
Joseph Jefferson
There are lots of comic bosses and fathers in sitcoms, but the comic landlord remains rare.
Josh Widdicombe
Human relationships used to be easy: you had friends, boy- or girlfriends, parents, children, and landlords. Now, thanks to social media, it’s all gone sideways.
Susan Orlean
I remember when each 4th lot was vacant and overgrown, and the landlord only go this rent when you had it, and each day was clear and good and each moment was full of promise.
Charles Bukowski
I know that atmosphere of the Parisian apartment building, with the twin menaces of the concierge on the ground floor and the landlord upstairs.
Roman Polanski
A landlord is showing a couple around an apartment. The husband looks up and says, ‘Wait a minute. This apartment doesn’t have a ceiling.’ The landlord answers, ‘That’s OK. The people upstairs don’t walk around that much.’
Gilbert Gottfried
Life is a lease and God is the landlord.
Sarah Strohmeyer
Cheat your landlord if you can — and must — but do not try to shortchange the Muse.
William S. Burroughs
When I lived in the suburbs of Washington, D.C., I was rather proud that my landlord was almost the only African-American in my unofficially segregated neighbourhood (the other one was the adopted child of our admirable next-door neighbours).
Peter Hitchens
We do not want to create a situation like that which exists in South Africa, where the whites are the owners and rulers, and the blacks are the workers. If we do not do all kinds of work, easy and hard, skilled and unskilled, if we become merely landlords, then this will not be our homeland
David Ben-Gurion
When I was nine years old, I was in a movie called, ‘Landlord’ with Pearl Bailey, Lou Gossett, and Beau Bridges.
Charlie Murphy
Tenants don’t have any right to court-appointed attorneys in civil court, so they’re either facing their landlord – or his or her attorney – alone, or they just don’t show up. That reflects a severe power imbalance.
Matthew Desmond
I want to be a successful landlord. I like real estate.
2 Chainz
Public housing projects as well as private landlords are free to deny housing to people with criminal records. In fact, you don’t even have to be convicted. You can be denied housing – or your family evicted – just based on an arrest.
Michelle Alexander
And a revolution of automation finds machines replacing men in the mines and mills of America, without replacing their incomes or their training or their needs to pay the family doctor, grocer and landlord.
John F. Kennedy
If the roof caves in and the tenants are sitting in the debris, they will laugh like hell. They will endure any hardship as long as it means trouble for the landlord.
Harry Golden
I knew a notorious reptile dealer who would send me animals for Area. I regret that. I mean, the landlord had wolves and an arctic fox upstairs and quite possibly a tiger.
Eric Goode
I get the feeling that characters are written female when they have to be, and all the other characters are male, and it doesn’t occur to somebody that the lawyer, the best friend, the landlord, whoever, can be female.
Geena Davis
I sold my house this week. I got a pretty good price for it, but it made my landlord mad as hell
Garry Shandling
The relation of landlord and tenant is not an ideal one, but any relations in a social order will endure if there is infused into them some of that spirit of human sympathy which qualifies life for immortality.
George William Russell
My ideal job? Landlord of a bordello! The company’s good and the mornings are quiet, which is the best time to write.
William Faulkner
The interest of the landlord is always opposed to the interests of every other class in the community.
David Ricardo
Making the landlord and the tenant the same person has certain advantages, as that the tenant pays no rent, while the landlord does a little work.
Gilbert K. Chesterton
The landlord of colonial days may not have been the greatest man in town, but he was certainly the best-known, often the most popular, and ever the most picturesque and cheerful figure.
Alice Morse Earle
If the demand for home commodities should be diminished, because of the fall of rent on the part of the landlords, it will be increased in a far greater degree by the increased opulence of the commercial classes.
David Ricardo
‘Trapped In The Closet’ lives in a place on the earth on its own. It pays its own rent, it’s its own landlord, it owns the building, it’s everything. And it’s so separate from what R. Kelly does; that’s the great thing about it.
R. Kelly
The workingmen have been exploited all the way up and down the line by employers, landlords, everybody.
Henry Ford
Landlords grow rich in their sleep without working, risking or economizing. The increase in the value of land, arising as it does from the efforts of an entire community, should belong to the community and not to the individual who might hold title.
John Stuart Mill
Deism, historically, produces atheism. First you make God a landlord, then an absent landlord, then he becomes simply absent.
N. T. Wright
My parents are super westernized. My mom listens to western music, my dad was like a pub landlord so he properly embraced English life. But the truth is they both came from tiny villages in Sri Lanka.
Romesh Ranganathan
The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up… until the day you got the security deposit back. You’re arguing with the landlord… ‘No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!’
Jeff Foxworthy
Freedom, in a political context, means freedom from government coercion. It does not mean freedom from the landlord, from the employer, or freedom from the laws of nature which do not provide men with automatic prosperity. It means freedom from the coercive power of the state ‘ and nothing else
Ayn Rand
Come landlord fill a flowing bowl until it does run over,
Tonight we will all merry be–tomorrow we’ll get sober.
John William Fletcher
Landlords grow rich in their sleep without working, risking or economising
John Stuart Mill
My landlord lives in the flat at the bottom of the stairs. I rent a studio flat from him, and live at the top of the staircase. There are two more flights of stairs and four more flats, but it’s me he is obsessed with.
Craig Stone
“What is your best, your very best, ale a glass?” “Two pence halfpenny,” says the landlord, “is the price of the Genuine Stunning Ale.” “Then,” says I, producing the money, “just draw me a glass of the Genuine Stunning, if you please, with a good head on it.”
Charles Dickens
Making movies is a very different experience in a lot of ways. It’s difficult when you’re used to owning the copyright and having a landlord’s possessory rights – I rent my plays to the companies that do them and, if I’m upset, I can pull the play. But the only two directors I’ve worked with are pretty great.
Tony Kushner
Having an awful landlord can be a good thing, it can bring you together as a household.
Josh Widdicombe
And yet we are but tenants. Let us assure ourselves of this, and then it will not be so hard to make room for the new administration; for shortly the great Landlord will give us notice that our lease has expired.
Joseph Jefferson
The best job that was ever offered to me was to become a landlord in a brothel. In my opinion it’s the perfect milieu for an artist to work in.
William Faulkner
I’m recording our history now on the bedroom wall, and when we leave the landlord will come and paint over it all.
Ani DiFranco
How do you whip up resentment against absentee landlords and pocketers of bribes when the highest ambition of the people is either to become the former or be in a position to receive the latter?
John Brunner
Democracy means doing whatever you want without asking permission of anybody but your boss, your doctor, your lawyer, your landlord, your bank, your city, your state and federal authorities, and your wife and children.
Sam Levenson
All of us kids in the neighbourhood had to go shoeless for the same reason – all except the landlord’s son, because his father had more income.
Jacques Plante
As soon as the land of any country has all become private property, the landlords, like all other men, love to reap where they never sowed, and demand a rent even for its natural produce.
Adam Smith
No sooner is the exploitation of the labourer by the manufacturer, so far, at an end, that he receives his wages in cash, than he is set upon by the other portions of the bourgeoisie, the landlord, the shopkeeper, the pawnbroker, etc.
Karl Marx
We both grew up in the atmosphere of struggle, both Ossie and me, … I come out of Harlem and Harlem comes out of me – wailing police sirens and street parties, rumors and landlords, that cultural, spiritual scene. And Ossie came up from the South, where struggle and dying were part of everyday life. That is who we are.
Ruby Dee
We are all great landed proprietors, if we only knew it. What we lack is not land, but the power to enjoy it. Moreover, this great inheritance has the additional advantage that it entails no labor, requires no management. The landlord has the trouble, but the landscape belongs to everyone who has eyes to see it.
John Lubbock
The rich landlord is he who collects with sternness, who accepts no excuse, and will have his own. There are moments of irritation and of real bitterness against him, but there is still admiration, because he is rich and successful.
Jane Addams
Almost all the people I’ve met in temporary accommodation fell behind with their rent because of benefit cuts, or found their landlord was no longer willing to keep them on since their income had been frozen.
Dawn Foster
In the big city, if the man next door happens to be a slum landlord, a Mafia bag man, or a long distance runner, what does it matter, as long as he puts his garbage out on Tuesdays?
Hal Higdon
Landlords, like all other men, love to reap where they never sowed.
Karl Marx
I know we can’t have a great architecture while it is only for the landlord.
Frank Lloyd Wright
I unknowingly accepted impermissible benefits from my summer landlord. I look forward to moving on from this incident and to supporting my alma mater for many years to come.
Devon Cajuste
Whenever rent controls or increased tenants’ rights are raised, naysayers wail that doing so will cause landlords to flee the rental market. Firstly, that is a canard: if a landlord charges ВЈ1000 for a room, and you tell him from now on he can only charge ВЈ900, he won’t decide to instead earn nothing.
Dawn Foster
God gives us life, but the world’s landlord is the devil.
Carlos Ruiz Zafon
Never have I got on better with my flatmates than when our landlord installed a dodgy deadlock and locked us out of our flat for a full Friday evening.
Josh Widdicombe