Paul Reiser Quotes.
Marriage is just an elaborate game that allows two selfish people to periodically feel that they’re not.
In the original draft I was 27 and Peter was 55 in the script. That’s not the same as a guy in his 40s and a dad in the end of his 70s. It’s a different point in both our lives.
He was born early. But he was born within a safe range of premature.
But the two of them together, broke my heart. Olympia and Peter, those scenes… When they’re kissing in their 20s and then kissing in their 70s, that’s what it is. And they had never met five minutes before they shot those scenes.
Upstate New York in the middle of October. You can’t get more beautiful than that.
Nothing would make me happier if Peter Falk would finally win his Oscar for this. Not just as the writer but as a fan and a friend. It would be so great.
We have such a long, familiar history with Peter Falk. The minute his mug is on that screen people smile.
Get a good dog. We have not picked up food in the kitchen in 15 years.
The jewel in the baby product crown is the stroller. And if in America you are what you drive, then in Parentland, you are what you push.
In fact, I had the idea because of Peter Falk. I saw my dad watching a Peter Falk movie and something clicked in my head. I gotta go make a movie for Peter Falk and me.
If a tree falls on your head in a forest and no one hears it, it still hurts.
We had the boy’s name picked out, but we didn’t have a girl’s. When he turned out to be a boy, we were so relieved. Literally, in the middle of contracting and pushing, and with my wife being drugged – out and half – lucid, we were still coming up with names.
But you get past that and realize you have to let go of what you think you want. There’ll be plenty of time for that later. Right now, go and be with that baby. Just play with this beautiful little boy.
There’s something that happens in that delivery room, when a woman becomes ten times more a woman, and a guy becomes six times less a man. You feel really dopey and useless and like a spectator. I did, anyway.
Middle names are kind of like vice presidents: It’s a fine distinction and certainly an honor, but you’re never not aware that someone else got the real job.
She kind of reminds one of Helen. There’s something very similar about Elizabeth Perkins.
But you get past that and realize you have to let go of what you think you want. There’ll be plenty of time for that later. Right now, go and be with that baby. Just play with this beautiful little boy
And in that time, I lost my dad and had kids of my own. It was like, OK, I get it now. I know what fatherhood is all about. And you look at your parents differently.
I remember my wife and I used to get on plane and see everybody else with their babies. They’d be putting strollers and car seats up above, and we’d think: Oh, please Lord, don’t make us go through that.
But at the same time that the experience is pulling you apart, it’s also bonding you. You have this joint venture! You both made this baby. And that’s the thing I still can’t get over.
I’d distract myself until finally it was a combination of things. The show was over and I had time on my hands. I had taken time and played and just relaxed.
Happiness is the quiet lull between problems.
Parents often give middle names just so that later, when they’re yelling at the kid, they can drag it out. Henry David Thoreau, you come in here this instant!
My parenting style could be described as not good cop or bad cop so much as nervous cop. I’m always yelling for somebody to stop because they’re about to get hurt. I’m the take a jacket, slow down guy.
I used to walk into a party and scan the room for attractive women. Now I look for women to hold my baby so I can eat potato salad sitting down.
The biggest thing I remember is that there was just no transition. You hit the ground diapering.